Chapter 65: I'm Not Bragging! I'm Asking for Advice!
There was something quite beautiful in the way the rats on Floor 11 respawned.
It looked magical in the sense that an area that was devoid of life would suddenly look like a public beach during a heatwave. Well, besides the fact that they were all monsters and the only liquid they would bathe in was the blood of the fallen. Then again…
Josh soon exited the Tower, 3 days and 6 Ratskin Boots later. He quickly went to a shop to sell it to a nice U-Bot. Josh would soon go from in debt to broke. After repaying it all, he was left with 278 Credits, far from the 20k+ he once possessed.
But now, Josh felt as if he had regained his freedom, impending doom from a limited lifespan aside. Was this how it felt to repay student loans?
He now had a few things to do: check out the pet situation in detail, keep climbing, get his rewards for that job at the school, and medium-term he still needed to find a way to get skills. There was also the situation of Metropolis C that he needed to be mindful of but Dario would probably update him on it.
Actually, last time Dale had. What was he even up to? Josh felt that it was important to check up on friends so he took the time to compose a literary masterpiece of a message to inquire about his overall situation. It read: "You alive?".
As for the pet situation, Josh headed directly for the D district to meet that one crazy Hegel guy. He felt Hegel would present both the conventional and the unconventional information, then he'd be able to fact check it all with the guild.
The building was the same old boring one. On the floor, there was mail piling up. It seemed to be all from that researcher's mailbox that was completely full. Many letters seemed to actually be from something called <CT Entertainment>.
That's when the sound of a door being opened resonated. There he was, Hegel coming back from god knows where. "Hey, Josh! How have you been?" In his hand, he was holding a leash, one that was connected to a little furry animal.
Josh couldn't help but ask: "What's with the skunk?"
"That, my friend, is my new partner. He's the best to take on long walks. Before, there used to be some annoying pricks harassing me. I couldn't do anything about it because they were operating within acceptable limits. Let me tell you, after weeks and weeks of acceptable limits you just feel like screwing their head the opposite way to see if it'll help."
"So you bought a skunk?"
"Indeed, I bought a skunk. Now they walk the other way when they encounter me." Then Hegel pointed at the letters on the ground. "I'm talking about these guys! They want to hire me for a show but I keep refusing, so now they just drop this here."
"Can't you tell them to stop?"
"I did, but there are no laws concerning paper mail, I mean barely anyone uses that anyway. Digital for documents and U-bots for package delivery at the most convenient time. It's just tradition to have a mailbox but they are all empty anyway."
"….What's the point then?"
Hegel simply shrugged. "There are many pointless things in this world, paper mail is simply one of them."
"Fair enough. Anyway, I need information. What do you know about pets?"
"Pets? You should love them, care for them, feed them, make sure they are safe, brush and wash them from time to time too. You know, the usual. Quite like a girlfriend but without the nagging and the sex, at least I hope. Then again, the ratio of these two last elements varies a lot from couple to couple."
"Eh, are you talking about an animal right now? I'm asking about the Tower."
Suddenly the entire aura of the man drastically changed. He went from calm and peaceful to extremely solemn, but then reverted to an easygoing appearance and a cheerful tone. "How about we head inside for some tea?."
Then as soon as they were inside, Hegel closed the door, locked it, locked it again, dragged a chair to completely make it stuck, swept around his whole apartment with a small metallic item, then and only then did he gesture Josh to sit down for a talk.
"What was all that about?" This whole series of events was way too exaggerated for a man that was recognized as a failed researcher.
"Just to be safe. So you found a pet in the Tower? Where, when, how, what is it, did you tell anyone about this, were you followed here-?!
"I think that's enough questions. Floor 11, 3 days, a reward for a Feat, no, not that I know and it's this." Then Josh summoned said pet. It appeared on the room carpet and remained unmoving there, eyes empty.
"Wow! How does it work? Can you summon it in and out of existence whenever you want? How strong is it?"
"It has its own equipment slot, well pet slot. I haven't managed to have it do anything just yet. Right, it seems to be something problematic with it.
"What's the system description?"
"Question marks, nothing else. Anyway, what's with all the secrecy and what do you know about it?"
"What's with the secrecy, you say?! There is no available information online on it! Nowhere, I'm telling you! Now, if you ask me, who am I supposed to ask?! *Sigh* I just wish we had a way of talking to some Ranker to…no that's ridiculous."
"I'll ask my guild real quick." Josh quickly typed in the guild chat.
-Josh MF Malum: Hey guys, anyone knowledgeable about pets? Just got one and I don't know what to do with it.
-Emsee Hammer: Brother, you need to clearly state the race of your pet. Otherwise, how are we supposed to give clear advice?
-Ronan the Healer: You guys wanna bet on the kind of pet he got? I pick black mamba. Two drops of venom and you are dead, sounds like the kind of pet he'd have.
-Lucas the Lancer: *Scoff* That's where you are wrong! He clearly has a pet Gaboon Viper! Super mild generally but god help you if you make it mad for it will unleash its wrath in the most agonizing of ways.
-Friendly Terry: I see him more as a prehistoric megalodon kinda guy.
-Lily of the Frontline: If you are going there can I say T-Rex?
-Liam the Ultimate Samurai: I feel like you guys are thinking too "normal". It's Josh we are talking about. For all we know, he went back to D-23 and tamed a Slothtrosity as he calls them.
-Lucas the Lancer: Bro, are you forgetting the golden rules? No blatant foreshadowing or 4th wall breaking. But, don't think I cannot one-up that! Change my vote! Josh totally tamed *Drum-roll* a god itself!
-Lilly of the Frontline: Will you guys stop messing around? Anyway, what is it, Josh?
-Josh MF Malum: It's called <Godly Pseudo-Pet Rat!>. It dropped from a random mission reward that gave a random mystery box, one containing useful items for the <God-kin creator> Class. That was on Floor 11, 3 days ago.
-Lucas the Lancer: It has godly in the name…Did I win? I freaking won?! Wait, admit it. You were just trying to brag, am I right Josh? You know what? I'm jealous AF whatever that pet thing is.
-Peaceful Joe: Such overpowered display is unnecessary, young one.
Except Josh truly wasn't trying to brag. He truly wanted information! He could not do much with a despondent pet no matter how godly.
-Ronan the Healer: *Sigh* I was way off with my deadly snake guess. I shot for the moon and Josh was already in another dimension: a pet from the goddamn Tower.
-Dragon Daddy: That sure sounds nice. But, do you know what is even better? Dragons! Now dragons are way better because of ...
What followed was a wall of text that everyone simply ignored.
-Gorgeous Kasha: What are you guys talking abouttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt WTF?!
-Serene Brings the Heat: Think you left your finger a bit too long on the T right there, Kasha. Hey, look! The Josh kid is breaking common sense once again...who would have expected that! (Sarcasm if you hadn't noticed)
-Minor, No Flirting: I have a few points to raise. Godly Rat: WTF is that?! Mystery box: WTF is that?! God-kin creator: WTF is that?! Josh himself: WTF is that?! I am done…for now.
That is when Josh saw that he had gotten a reply from Dale. Apparently, he was fine and was busy climbing too. Josh felt the satisfaction of meaningful social exchange and replied with a thoughtful "k".
That is when a literal notification Hell happened in quick succession. Pretty much all the living core members of Draconic were busy tagging Josh in quick succession while only writing: "?!?", "WTF", "OP!", "You beat Dario!", "OMG!" and other obscure pointless reactions.
But what was that about beating Dario? At first, Josh couldn't wrap his head around it, but then they started sharing a video. The title was "Faceslapping the guild master so hard he might not ever recover."
After watching it, both Josh and Hegel objectively agreed, the title was very accurate!
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