I was still inside the head of my old self but it just got swarmed with negative emotions that could make anyone pass or thrash out. I felt my old self phase in and out of consciousness as our mind almost got wrecked from seeing our parents die, but something happened that I couldn't remember.
'What is… going… on?'
The thoughts that were running through my head, that came from my old self, stopped entirely before I was face to face with my parents' killer.
I could barely make out his facial features because of his fucked hair covering his face, but I got a good look at his mouth that had the smile that haunted me for years. However, another wave of pain and torture clashed with my head before I saw his lips move.
'Wait… what? This is not… I can't remember…'
I was 100% sure I saw, heard, and remember everything that happened through the CCTVs that were in our old house, but there was definitely something they could miss if it was just installed in a corner of the room it was installed in.
For instance, the words I read from his lips couldn't be clearer.
"S-Sorry man… but god will forgive–"
That was when my body jolted and attempted a draw-slash, but it seemed as if the blow to my mind was too strong, I wasn't able to perform a killing blow.
It was completely a draw wrought with raw emotion but despite all that, it amounted to nothing.
I choked it up as 'hesitation' as I saw it from the screen before, but no way it could show me what was going in my head right now.
My other psyche was completely silent at first but my body almost gave out from the rush of orders it was telling itself to kill what was in front of it. It would've made an entire notebook black if it was a written request.
It was an all too familiar feeling to be completely honest, but it was completely different the first time it was unleashed. I definitely grew some resistance and some control with it right now, but my old self had no chance whatsoever.
With that said, my mind was still in a war with itself as to how to fucking cut up that bastard, my body lagged for a few seconds.
That was enough time for that motherfucker to wear an even maniacal smile before he slashed at my arm over and over, in an attempt to separate the evil with me. However, his body just received too much damage to deliver a deeper cut, and even if he was using my mom's knife, he wasn't able to do what he wanted.
But I did.
I don't know how but my arm getting cut up several times made the orders coming from my head unanimous. This gave me the same feeling when I was purposefully releasing killing intent and it said one thing:
"Lop his arm off."
My body never felt so in harmony with its mind and it just moved as it was supposed to.
His arm was just flying in the air in a fraction of a second but my other psyche got control for a few seconds. That was when I heard myself shouting to the bastard, asking for answers but I was completely watching how his lips moved.
I remembered that he was just spouting gibberish at this moment but maybe he was also trying to tell me something else.
'W-What is he even–'
Let's just say that I wasn't so lucky to form words from reading his lips this time, but I heard something different despite his screams and the music blasting from my room.
I heard something else before a vase hit my face and before I started chasing him down.
It was so faint, our CCTVs didn't pick it up but being awake in this state gave me that option to finally know everything that I missed from looking at a recording. I could probably guess the headaches I'm having were just ways that my brain was finally getting the fragments from my broken core memories that got buried all these years though I didn't know if it'll be a blessing or a curse.
I found an answer to a question I didn't even think of asking because of several reasons, but it made all the difference seeing the whole picture.
My old self was preoccupied with something else and it was a bitter-happy thing that my head caught something amidst all the chaos. Not everyone could have the chance to do it, and even if the moment had already passed for them, they still left something for me. Both of them were dying but they chose words we rarely say to each other but always meant when we do.
'I'm sorry too Mom… I'm sorry too Dad… I love both of you too… Always…'
The headaches and the ringing noise completely stopped and the scene that was playing on my head slowly faded into nothingness, before I saw myself staring at the ceiling. I eventually got the feeling from my whole body back though the first person I saw was still the mother of my favorite person. However, tears were streaming down her cheeks though she was smiling brightly.
Marisha gave me a hug as soon as I got up and I never felt such a warm embrace.
I felt like sleeping right now but something warm just came out of my eyes before my body trembled all over. I just started bawling on the spot as Marisha was hugging me, and I just hugged her as tightly as I could.
"T-Thank you… I didn't even know…"
"You don't need to thank me… You did most of the work…"
"B-But… How did you–"
"I have my ways… you have your own… I just don't show off every chance they get like someone in this room… It's our secret now, okay?"
"Psychotherapist-Client Privilege?"
"Sure, let's call it that… But you gotta pay me to make it official," Marisha jokingly chuckled before letting go of me.
"Heh, I'll write you a check if you promise not to cash it? Anyway, I got to show off at the place we're going so that if anything happens, the target will be on my back, not Kaley's. I know she can handle herself but I still want her to be the safest one there."
Marisha looked at me with a kind expression before opening her mouth, "I know. But just remember that Kaley and everyone here would do the same for you. They'll also be sad if something happens to you, okay? Me and Matthew included. My husband's a hard-ass but forgive him for not knowing the whole thing… Client Privilege and all… I tell him a few things but not about my clients… especially the best one."
"Best one? I'll take it, I guess… But trust me… I don't know the whole thing either… But… It's not like I was living a lie even though I'm unaware of that thing… It… It would amount to nothing for some people but for me… it means everything… Can I tell Kaley about this?"
"It's up to you but I think you would even if I say no– not that I would say no… it's best to be open with each other's business only if they're involved or part of it."
"I thought you were keeping a few things from Matthew as well? Is that any different?"
"Want me to tell him that you're in an open relationship with our daughter? I know it's kinda different but– you know what I mean now, right?"
I nodded after a smile, "It depends on who's business it is…"
"Exactly. I'm 'technically' free to tell him all I know since we're married but it's just a matter of being respectful with someone else's business that wasn't yours. Do you understand what I'm saying?"
"I understand…"
"Okay, that's good. Do you want us to head outside now? They've been waiting for a while. Trust me, they tried to break in when you started screaming but Kaley knows what I'm doing and she blocked the door for us."
"Really?"
"Yes."
"That's just toxic…"
"Ye– What did you just say?"
"She's Kaley The White now–"
"HAHAHAHAHA!!! You're really something else… Fly! You fools!"
"YOOOO~ YOU GOT IT!"
Marisha and I got a laugh and shared a moment and it didn't take long before we opened the door and saw Kaley and Matthew with Tatiana, Cynthia, Oscar, Jared, Lois, and etc.
They didn't know what to do when they saw my face but let's just say Kaley just leaped onto me and latched on like a fucking Facehugger.
Well, I didn't try to pry her off me because I would've lifted her up and held her in my arms.
However, we still had one more issue to resolve, man-to-man.
I was about to ask Matthew to come to talk with me privately, but I saw him looking at Jared and Lois giving him a signal before he removed his shirt. The people who knew were already smiling like idiots, and the ones who didn't, wore the same expression Kaley and Tatiana wore when they saw this family tradition for the first time.
In which case, I asked Kaley to get off me for a moment before I did the same thing as Matthew did. I removed my shirt in front of everybody and I walked up to his face with a calm expression.
The two of us just looked at each other for a moment before I broke the silence.
"You sure about this?"
"Yeah, I don't wanna cut your cheek the second time."
"Hah! Did you lose a tooth or nah?"
"Talk all you want but I'm going 100% with this."
"Go ahead, don't blame me for going above the limit. You don't fucking know what I just went through."
"I think I do. Try me."
Well, I did try… violently and way above as I normally could.
Let's just say both of us had a searing handprint on our backs when we parted ways, and I could still feel it when we left the Manila Bay. However, let's just say Matthew took a lot more than he could handle and he'd pay for it for a few days.
My mind never felt so clear since I had a closure I didn't know I could have, and I told Kaley, Tatiana, and Cynthia all about it. Kaley never left my side even though she was really sleepy and I just found her leaning on me while we were enjoying the breeze outside. The other two were already asleep on our room and I carried Kaley in the same room before I went back to the same spot I was standing on earlier.
I don't know what happened– Well, I partially do but I just had more energy now even if I so wanted to take a nap earlier. It was totally indescribable what my mind and my body had just undergone but it seemed like I would know the difference once we lay anchor.
It was already nearing sunrise since we've been going for a few hours, and I just found the perfect place to blow some more steam.
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