Florida Man's General Store in Cultivation World

Chapter 252 Florida Man Requests Pronoun Change at Government Office to Identify as 'Texas Man,' Citing Ownership of Machine-Gun-Armed Cows as Justification.

Chapter 252 – Florida Man Requests Pronoun Change at Government Office to Identify as 'Texas Man,' Citing Ownership of Machine-Gun-Armed Cows as Justification.

"Her tardiness is quite something," Leo remarked as he, Filip, and three others sat in the lobby, their expressions darkened.

Andria's absence had stretched the day unbearably long. Although the eternal nature of the immortals helped endure such waits, Leo felt a tinge of drowsiness after an intense staring contest with the visitors.

"Should we search for her?" Filip inquired.

"Nah, I can sense her life force. She's likely around here, lost in something," Leo replied confidently.

True to Leo's intuition, Andria eventually made her way to the tavern of heroes, accompanied by Hua Taixu. Strangely, both had ascended to the deity realm in their cultivation.

Hua Taixu sought Leo out for an upgrade, while Andria arrived to report her transformation.

"C-Commander, I've made it. I'm now a deity," she announced.

"What?!" Filip exclaimed, attempting to gauge her newfound strength but finding it impenetrable.

"Me, STRONK! Master, Help, STRONGER!" Hua Taixu chuckled, joining Leo and proudly brandishing a cup of the rare holy water of true fate crystal, which he obtained from the pylon tower's fountain.

Leo, feeling a headache looming, reclined against his couch and accessed Hua Taixu's status menu to review the upgrade costs for the summoned shadow.

Hua Taixu stood at level 10, aka the deity realm's starting point. The next level required a drop of fate crystal's holy water and 1,000 YOL to boost his strength by a star. However, there was no maximum limit how many stars Hua Taixu could hold.

Leo realized the potential for inflation and the financial drain this could become.

Turning to Hua Taixu, Leo posed a pointed question, "How many stars do you intend to attain, Hua Taixu?"

Hua Taixu beamed, "MANY!"

"How many?"

"MANY!"

"…"

Leo couldn't justify expending 10 million years of lifespan just to bolster the foundation of one or two subordinates. He believed that one million YOL or 1,000 stars should suffice for an employee. If Hua Taixu desired more, he'd have to offer something in return.

"I'm using up so much life force for you. You've got to put in more effort than before, alright?"

"ME STRONK! ME WORK HARDER!"

Shaking his head, Leo lamented the investment of hard-earned lifespan into this caveman. Still, he elevated the guy's cultivation base to a 1,000-star deity.

Though Hua Taixu's level remained at 10, his strength surged drastically. His aura emitted the presence of a supreme expert, and muscular size grew.

However, overzealous upgrading of the shadow bore consequences. The system notified Leo of an unprecedented event.

DING

<Your subordinate Hua Taixu no longer shares a karmic tie with the original Hua Taixu's karmic soul.>

<The soul of the original Hua Taixu has sensed your presence.>

DING

<Hua Taixu has sent a friend request.>

"Hmm?"

Leo felt perplexed. According to the biography, Hua Taixu should have been long deceased. Yet, the recent message contradicted this information.

There was something off about this individual. Nevertheless, in the pursuit of gathering more information, Leo accepted the friend request.

The friend system became available after Leo constructed the tavern of heroes. He could add any system user as a friend, including Acku. However, at that moment, Leo tested it with the original Hua Taixu.

DING

Upon accepting the request, the name appeared, but strangely, the portrait depicted a different person. He seemed younger and considerably more astute.

"Um, could you finalize the deal?" Filip interrupted Leo's absentmindedness.

"Oh, right. My mistake. Here," Leo activated his system and collected the payment, "I'll go fetch the soul stones. You can rest here. But you, come with me, you monkey!"

Leo dragged Hua Taixu's shadow along, knowing there was much to discuss.

.

.

Meanwhile, Filip inquired of Andria the reason for her delay.

"What happened yesterday? How did you ascend!?" he asked.

Andria admitted, "That strange old man pulled me into an odd location. It felt like it existed within a space-time array. Time passed differently there, much longer than usual."

"I'm having trouble grasping this."

"You'd have to experience it firsthand. I was stuck there for what felt like over a year, I believe."

"…Incredible."

Filip and the other three soldiers became intrigued, discussing a plan to visit the facility once their current deal concluded.

.

.

After pulling Hua Taixu aside, Leo questioned him, "Aren't you Hua Taixu? Why is there another individual?"

Hua Taixu snorted, "Me, shadow. He, real. We, no same!"

"Yeah, I get that. But weren't you supposed to be deceased?"

"Dead, he. Me clone! Me alive!"

"…I see. Next question, why is the real one alive?"

"Rebirth! He baby again!"

"Ah."

Leo found this explanation enlightening, yet it raised numerous questions and mysteries about the cycle of reincarnation. He wondered if Sierra's situation was similar.

While Leo conversed with Hua Taixu, the original finally messaged him.

"You're exploiting my clone, aren't you?"

Leo replied, "Your descendants longed for your return, but you never did. It's not my fault."

"Whatever you just did has damaged my reputation and my safety. I've recently reincarnated and am on the verge of becoming a sage. Raising my clone's cultivation base might have alerted my enemies to my existence. They'll start searching for me, and I'll be in trouble!"

"But he isn't you."

"He's my shadow! He has my former face. His actions affect me!"

"Ah, my mistake." Leo began feeling guilty about Hua Taixu. Yet, he believed it wasn't solely his responsibility as Hua Taixu never returned to assist Hua Jiashan and the Life Sword Sect.

"Anyway, I'm currently at the Fate Stadium. If you swing by, let me know. I have something to pass on to Hua Jiashan."

"…Alright."

The two conversed for a while before Leo resumed his duties.

.

.

The alchemy workshops had been bustling. Nearly reaching their maximum level, these buildings delivered satisfactory performances.

Soul stones, grain pills, and other products poured from these workshops, their production rate so rapid that the alchemist trainees felt dizzy.

Arriving at the fifth floor, Leo hurried into one of the workshops and inquired about the storage of finished products. He then swiftly gathering everything.

Creating soul stones proved simple using essence stones as primary materials. Moreover, the conversion rate was based on the workshop's quality. Instead of the usual one soul stone per 1,000 essence stones, each cauldron produced 50!

Leo was astonished but kept quiet. He gathered these precious cultivation resources to exchange with the visitors.

These soul stones were significantly larger than hand-sized essence stones, each almost the size of an adult human. Leo stowed them in a spare spatial ring, aiming to fulfill the request.

However, time was pressing. A workshop with five cauldrons managed 250 soul stones daily. With 10 workshops, Leo procured 2,500 soul stones for the moment.

"Well, this might take a while. They might need to stay for 3 or 4 days," Leo mused.

Returning to Filip's group, he informed them of the delay.

"It'll take about 4 days to transfer 10,000 soul stones. For now, here's 2,500," he said, passing a storage ring containing the fresh soul stones to Filip.

Filip examined the ring's content. His eyes lighted up at the sight of such potent soul stones.

"Senior Florida Man, this is incredible! We'll gladly wait! We'll gladly even if it takes a year!"

"I see."

Filip passed the ring around for the others to see. Andria and the rest were elated as these soul stones held more energy than any they had encountered before.

Realizing they'd be stuck for a while, Filip turned to Leo, "While we're here, could we explore your place? We're eager to check out the facility my comrade visited."

"Of course!" Leo welcomed the idea. "Some might require your lifespan as a fee. Talk to the mannequins by the shops. They'll guide you."

"Thank you! Oh, about the vegetables…"

"I'll trade for those, too. They'll spoil if kept on your ship, right?"

"Thank you for understanding, senior!"

Filip couldn't contain his happiness. This deal would benefit his world's local population. Plus, if Andria could advance her cultivation base within a day, Filip wanted to give it a try as well.

.

.

Leo left Filip and the group alone. Again, he was a busy man. After all, he hadn't used the SR gacha ticket and the premium currency to try his luck yet.

As Leo believed that fate crystals affected his luck, he entered his bus and poured all collected fate crystals on his bed. He then knelt and prayed.

"Bless me luck, my lucky charms! I want some good URs!"

Leo spent 16,000 premium currency and drew 11 building gacha balls from the machine!

DING-DING-DING

Leo closed his eyes, afraid to face reality. He only listened to the sound effects and pursed his lips.

DING-DING-DING

The sfx was loud and weird. Leo slightly opened his eyes to take a peek at the system screen.

A rainbow ball…

One rainbow ball…? Wait, there was another…

Two rainbow balls…?

TWO RAINBOW BALLS?!

TWO RAINBOW GACHA BALLS CAME OUT!!

Leo gasped for air. He smacked his chest as his heart almost stopped beating from shock.

Unfortunately, this king of luck had a consequence. Two of the sky fate crystals turned into dust!

"WWWWHAAATTTT?!"

Leo noticed the dusty pile on his bed and realized why it happened. He collected all fate crystals and sweated profusely. Instead of praying for a good roll, he wished the fate crystals wouldn't be all broken because of his stupid desire.

Fortunately, aside from the two sky fate crystals, the rest remained intact.

"Whew." Leo wiped his sweat and glanced at the UR icons. He brightly grinned.

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Portal to Cow Level

Number of Cows (x100) [0/25]

Quality of Cows [0/25]

Respawn Rate [0/25]

Portal Cooldown [0/25]

Can only be built on Mystic Realm Platform

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Portal to Agriculture Realm

Number of Farms (x100) [0/25]

Number of Fish Ponds (x100) [0/25]

Number of Pig Pens (x100) [0/25]

Number of Chicken Barns (x100) [0/25]

Can only be built on Mystic Realm Platform

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