Grabbing Your Hand, Dragging you Away

Special Chapter One (Recap) An Qing

An Qing has always been the favoured one, the child loved by everyone, with pretty looks and a gentle demeanour, anyone can see that she was raised with lots of love.

In fact, An Qing is aware of her parents’ bias, and actually doesn’t like that her older sister is being treated so unfairly, so she comes to the decision that she must treat An Ran very well, because if she doesn’t treat her well, who will?

The two sisters build a strong bond over the years, despite not seeing each other as often due to studies and work.

An Qing grows up to be a beauty with many admirers pursuing her, she dreams of a passionate romance with a man she loves, but when she does fall in love, it is love at first sight, the man being An Ran’s boyfriend, Yan You.

She never thought her story would be such a dog-bloodied one, just like those stories where the female lead falls in love with her sister’s or best friend’s boyfriend, and then the two will overcome the gossips surrounding them and courageously be together in the end. She wonders, would it be the same for her?

Whilst An Qing is troubled by her thoughts, shamelessly yearning for her sister’s boyfriend, she still holds a little hope inside of her.

She starts to see An Ran more frequently, in hopes of getting to know Yan You more.

An Ran has always loved to share her happiness with An Qing since young, and would tell her all about her relationship with Yan You, from how they met to their sweet little moments. This only made An Qing more jealous, but she just smiles in front of her sister, her love for Yan You continuing to grow.

No one would have thought that this perfect child has already developed such an ugly side to her, suppressing her pain as she sinks further into jealousy.

That’s right, she’s prettier than An Ran, she’s more favoured than An Ran, she receives more doting love from their parents than An Ran, all this, she doesn’t care about, but why is it that the person she cares about, just has to care about An Ran more?

An Ran, based on what?

It was her that passed the tissues to An Ran when An Ran cried, it was her that comforted An Ran when An Ran was upset, it was her that brought warmth to An Ran when An Ran was lonely, but why must An Ran still have to snatch away the only person she cares about?

Three years passes, Yan You and An Ran’s relationship is still going strong, already making marriage plans.

It was in this moment, that An Ran was diagnosed with blood cancer.

Whilst this brought shock and sorrows, An Qing also sees the light in this.

An Ran and Yan You’s clear skies has been clouded, and An Qing is stunned, aside from the complicated emotions of sorrow, she vaguely gives rise to joy, perhaps, she has a chance.

It is in human nature to chase after one’s own happiness, ignoring the pain it brings others.

Just like how An Qing in this very moment, didn’t give the slightest consideration to how much pain An Ran would be in.

Every person’s heart has an ugly demon, once released, there is no going back.

Yan You continues to diligently stay by An Ran’s side, despite the treatments causing her hair to fall out, despite the treatments causing her temper to get worse, despite his parents crying for him to break up.

An Qing is pained by this sight of him, if only the one he loves is her.

Days pass with everyone waiting for the end they dare not to face.

That night, An Qing gives Yan You a call, she hears him muttering nonsense and comes to his apartment in concern.

In a drunken state, Yan You helplessly cries out his sorrows to An Ran, stating that he refuses to break up with her as his parents wishes, crying for her not to leave him.

An Qing is shaken by his outbreak, his deep love for An Ran. She makes a courageous move to kiss him, deeply kissing this man she loved for so many years. All she wants is one night.

That next morning, Yan You tells her last night was a mistake, he tells her to forget it.

An Qing thought that all she wanted was that one night, but she now hesitates, a great opportunity is before her, but it turns out, Yan You had noticed her feelings long before, just that, he had always hoped it was a mere misconception of his. He tells her, he doesn’t love her, she is only An Ran’s sister, the one he loves is An Ran, and always will be.

The two decide to forget about the night, but as fate would have it, she gets pregnant.

When Yan You hears the news, he tells her to abort it, but An Qing has already informed both their parents. So no matter how unwilling, Yan You had to go along with the wedding plans.

An Ran ultimately finds out about her pregnancy, and in face of her sister’s worries, An Qing finds that she has already become so twisted.

With the wedding approaching, An Qing knows it wouldn’t go as well as she wishes, yet she still persisted, as long as he is hers, but Yan You once again breaks her heart……

He tears the wedding invitation right before her face, wickedly saying: “Are you prepared to become a living widow?”

An Qing calmly says: “We’ll definitely get married.”

“Very well.” Yan You glances at her stomach, “Also, this child……” He smiles, “You rest assured, I will not love it, I want nothing more than for it to die this very instant, really.”

An Qing trembles in anger, how could he be like this? This is their child, this is a life that belongs to them, this is a life that will continue their bloodline!

The day before the wedding, An Qing pays An Ran a visit, she tells her the truth. She’ll be marrying Yan You, Yan You and her are together now.

She receives a fierce slap, An Ran tells her to “get lost” through gritted teeth. The tears falls as she leaves, her shamelessness, her guilt towards An Ran, her ruthlessness towards Yan You, but she is also very happy, because the one in pain, isn’t just her anymore.

The wedding proceeds, with smiles concealing her helplessness, his hatred.

She didn’t think An Ran would actually show up, fainting on the scene, then immediately rushed into hospital, and ten hours later, announced dead.

Yan You didn’t cry, just quietly holding An Ran’s pale corpse, but she knows his heart has died. And so she cries with a smile. Her sister is dead, she’s no longer the side character in their story, there’s no one to snatch away her husband.

Her parents were greatly affected by An Ran’s death, the look in their eyes when they see her gained an additional touch of coldness, the familiar doting love completely gone. An Qing does not desire anything from them, after all, their love was all given to her before, there’s nothing more she can ask for now.

At the same time, Yan You became soulless, but she doesn’t care, he is hers now. She can raise the baby herself, give it all the love, yet she starts to have frequent dreams of An Ran.

The An Ran in her dreams is still so pale white, delicate face showing no emotions, just silently watching her, until the guilt that she had deliberately suppressed in her heart comes surging out.

She pleadingly says: “An Ran, we were wrong, we were wrong, don’t leave us alright? I won’t fight you for Yan You anymore, I’ll give in to you, we won’t get married anymore.”

But An Ran’s eyes doesn’t even blink, slowly turning transparent, disappearing before her eyes.

An Qing wakes up drenched in sweat, she strokes her rounded stomach, begging An Ran to show her and the child some mercy.

However, the child was ultimately lost. All because An Qing had slipped on the stairs, Yan You who was beside her, avoided her with disgust, and she went rolling down. She sees red below, and painfully begs for Yan You to save the child.

Yan You coldly sends her to the hospital, just passing her over to the doctor, then leaves.

Whilst unconscious, An Qing thinks, perhaps she really was wrong, just because of a man who doesn’t love her, she fell so low.

After waking up to see her parents’ distressful faces, she tells them that she’s thought it through, the child was not meant to be. She has grown up now, no longer hating, no longer loving.

Her father hesitates, then slowly tells her, Yan You died, from gas poisoning

An Qing asks to be left alone, she questions whether it was An Ran who took him away, but that’s impossible, because An Ran will never like anything that has been flawed, no matter how much she loves it, should it contain the slightest flaw, she will discard it, with no regrets, that’s the only reason An Qing had the confidence to marry Yan You.

She suddenly recalls a distant scene, the young An Ran with a dirtied little face, grinning as she says to her: “An Qing, don’t be afraid, in future, tell me when you’re upset, I’ll help you take care of the people that picked on you! Oh, also, I’ll be by your side!”

She now feels extremely upset, so unbearably upset.

But she knows her sister will not smile at her anymore, never again.

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