It Was My Mistake (2)
I was sitting in front of the mirror.
Behind me, a maid was brushing my hair carefully.
“…Do you like it, miss?”
A bitter smile rose naturally while I was looking at the maid behind me in the mirror.
Why are you so nervous?
“Yes, tie it neatly with a ribbon at the end.”
“Yes.”
The maid’s touch quickened.
She seemed happy to be able to do it promptly and get out.
Perhaps it’s due to my cold expression, but the employees of the mansion feel distant. Still, it’s unfair because it’s not as if I can help it.
“I’m done, miss. Then…… May I go out to do my other duties?”
“Yes, what’s the schedule after this?”
“You can go to the restaurant for dinner.”
“Thank you.”
I looked at the back of the maid who did my hair as she disappeared quickly, looking like she had seen something scary, and then turned my head around.
I watched as another maid in the room freaked out.
That’s embarrassing. Do you hate me that much?
I tried not to look at my face as much as I could, and instead focused on my silver hair shining in the light.
Now I’m used to the long hair that comes down to my hips.
“But where’s Lira?”
Until now, I couldn’t see my exclusive maid, Lira. At my question, the maid’s lips quivered, but she answered fairly calmly.
“Lira is visiting Miss Rose for a while.”
“Rosé? Yes… Okay.”
Rosériel. She looked different because she was a fraternal twin, but she was born on the same day, just an hour after me.
However, she is the main character of the novel <Young Miss is Sweet>.
Today is Rosé and my birthday and our mother’s death anniversary.
We are now 8 years old.
Originally, an ordinary aristocratic family would have held a wonderful birthday party for their daughters’ birthdays.
But since it’s also the day of our mother’s death, the Hilingtons have been quiet enough to cause rumors to occur.
From what I remember, this is the same as the original – refraining from going outside and not letting anyone inside easily.
I sighed and got up from my seat.
There was still a long way to go, and I had to go down to see my dad and Rosé right now.
* * *
The sound of tablewares clashing rang loudly.
Rosé was still lacking in table manners.
That’s understandable. It can be difficult to move with that small hand.
“Hehe. I’m sorry.”
“Rosériel, is it because you don’t have good manners?”
“But Dad, there are too many knives and forks for no reason…”
“Rose, I shouldn’t have spoiled you like that.”
Strictly speaking, my father’s lips curved like a man in front of something extremely adorable.
Perhaps the other servants in the restaurant are all looking at the pink-haired child with those eyes.
Cute cheeks that look like they’re going to pop out if you press them. (PR: Think chipmunk?)
Small lips that move with a murmur.
Certainly, Rosé was a very pretty child.
On the other hand,
“…Hildea. Did you like your meal? I’ve prepared your favorite salmon.”
A stiff-faced dad asked me. It was an embarrassing change.
As I was chewing the meat in my mouth, I swallowed and nodded quietly.
“Yes.”
I felt even more sorry when I saw my father’s awkward face, as if he had spoken ceremonially, or as if he didn’t know what to say.
‘I shouldn’t have said that.’
You don’t have to be awkward with me.
“It was delicious, thank you.”
“Do you want more?”
“I’m full, so it’s okay.”
“Well, I see.”
There was silence.
I wanted to speak as delicately as I could, but my voice was hard and cold.
Seeing my father’s face furrow between his eyes was frustrating.
‘This can’t be it.’
I should have eaten alone. I think I came down to the restaurant for no reason.
It was just then.
As if she couldn’t stand the silence, Rosé got up from her chair and approached father and pulled on the hem of his clothes.
“Dad, don’t tell me such a trivial story! It’s my birthday and my sister’s birthday!”
Dad laughed only then.
“Ha. Yeah, that’s all you’ve been waiting for, little lady.”
“Yes!”
There was a sound of laughter from those who watched the confident voice and charming gestures.
I burst into laughter as well, but it must have been a distorted cackle, so I quickly covered my mouth with my hand.
‘Rosé is a really lovely child.’
Actually, it was difficult at first.
My name is Hildea, not Rose.
It’s a life that didn’t even exist in <Young Miss is Sweet>, so you never know when I will disappear.
All of those things.
‘I’ve seen everything in my past life and thought I was right.’
Thinking of how difficult it was, the anxiety and fear that my life might change just like in my previous life came to me.
Is it because I saw my dad, who doesn’t smile at me, gently smile at Rosé?
Or was it from when Lira, who was cold and expressionless, and the other maids lovingly observed the sleeping Rosel?
Was it from the time when the employees of the mansion, who avoided my gaze or awkwardly looked at me, waved their hands at Rosé?
Lira, who I thought was my only person, was actually Rose’s person as well.
‘I’m very worried because the second lady is weak. Oh, Miss Hill, are you worried, too?’
‘Uh-huh. Lira, what about Dad?’
‘The Duke has been gone for a while. Do you want to visit? Rather, the Duke was in the second lady’s room earlier…’
‘It’s okay.’
‘Miss?’
‘Dad is busy. I’m fine.’
From what I remember in the original story, the father was apathetic at first, but the reality was quite different.
Dad was awkward, but he was also kind to Rosé.
And it was the same for other people too.
It felt like I was the only one who couldn’t join in and get closer.
Actually it wasn’t okay.
Everyone’s attention was focused on Rosé, who was very weak since her childhood.
So when I was alone, my loneliness doubled. Without realizing it, it was to the point where I began acting like a real child.
I mainly grabbed Lira’s hem.
‘Lira. Are you going…?’
‘I’m sorry, miss. Miss Rosé suddenly got a fever… I’ll see you after a while. Are you hanging out with other maids?’
‘Yes…’
As the incidents piled up one by one, it became increasingly difficult for me to breathe from a certain point onward.
I wasn’t originally a bright baby who smiles well, but I’m getting more and more talkative.
It was because I was worried about how the other person would react when I said something.
Lira was so worried about it that she called in the doctor to see me several times.
‘The lady doesn’t speak.’
‘But, she doesn’t have any physical problems.’
‘Then… Are you saying it’s a mental problem?’
‘It seems like it. Try to not leave her alone as much as possible.’
It was funny.
The existence of my sister, where we had not seen each other until my mother died, comforted me.
Thanks to her, I felt warm and was able to breathe again.
“Li… Lira.”
‘Lady…’
‘I’m fine. How is Rosé?’
As soon as I opened my mouth again, Lira was relieved.
I think I heard Lira sobbing and whispering sorry in her sleep.
Anyways, I gave up and got used to my current position.
Because I wasn’t really a kid.
Rose is Rose. I am me.
When I fell in love with Rosé, I was able to look at her calmly.
In the end, everyone cares about and embraces Rosé has made her more powerful than anyone else.
In the novel, I have clearly experienced how the single-line narrative is expressed in reality.
‘Oh, my God. Lady Rosé must really like Lady Hildea. As expected, twin sisters have good friendship!’
As for me, Rosé was lovely.
Rosé smiled at me when everyone else was uncomfortable around me.
Her sparkling eyes melted hearts and even though our eye colors are the same, hers seemed to look more special.
How could you hate a child like that?
* * *
“Hildea, do you……don’t you like the present?”
“What? Oh, a gift?”
I blinked and looked up. I was too deep in thought.
Dad was frowning a little, and it seemed to me that he was unhappy.
“You haven’t even opened your birthday present yet.”
“I was thinking about something else for a moment. I’m sorry.”
“No, I’m not asking you to apologize.….”
“What?”
“Hmm, never mind. Why don’t you open the gift?”
“Yeah, sister. Open it up. What is it?”
Rose, who was staring with anticipation, had twinkling eyes while dad was frowning.
And I could see the maids looking at me as if they were unhappy that I had kept them waiting.
And the present in front of me.
I swallowed my dry saliva and tried to smile.
It didn’t go well.
Would it hurt for me to say that I’m nervous when they look at me like that?
“Thank you, Dad.”
Resignation and abandonment were very familiar, but it was still warmer here than in my previous life.
It’s like watching a novel that you liked in front of you.
It would have been nice if we could hang out naturally even if we weren’t equally loved.
“Sister, look at this, it’s a shiny hairpin. Dad bought me five! Am I pretty?”
“That’s why you feel good. It looks good on you.”
“Yes. So, open it up too. And you should be proud of me. Aren’t you looking forward to it? What a gift!”
Other people don’t know it well, but Rosé was amazingly aware of the moments when I was depressed and used that to her advantage.
‘Be nice.’
I felt like tears would come out, so I gave strength to my eyes.
They don’t seem to like me as much as I would like them to, but they were nice and lovely.
I felt like laughing and crying at the same time.
When I opened the box with trembling hands, what came out was…
TO BE CONTINUED……..
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