Chapter 87
TL: KSD
Becoming a star is easy.
At least, it was for Kim Byul.
-Excuse me, excuse me, could I take a picture with you, unnie, just once?
-Kyaaa! So cute!
-Whos that kid that everyones fussing over? Ah? Kim Byul? I know, I know! That girl whos always on TV these days!
The era when tigers smoked and legacy media dominated the press, Kim Byul suddenly became a star one day. (TL: The era when tigers smoked is an expression used in Korea before starting fables or fairy tales indicating very long time ago.)
It was an unprecedented event. Suddenly, the entire nation fell for the cute catchphrase of a pre-school child actor.
-Mom is a fool! A fool who only knows Dad!
Even now, the reason is unclear. One day, suddenly, just like that, Kim Byul became a star.
It was a common occurrence at that time. It was the era when a comedians casually thrown catchphrase would mesmerize the entire nation, so there was no reason why a cute child actor couldnt create a catchphrase.
But there was no effort on Kim Byuls part.
The role was secured by her mother. The lines were written by the writer.
However, all the popularity and benefits were Kim Byuls to claim.
The world seemed too easy, and I thought I was special. And for a child not yet in elementary school, there was no mindset to correct that thought.
Sometimes, I think. If I had only been a bit more conscious and made an effort back then, I wouldnt have to struggle to regain that popularity now.
Then perhaps, dad and mom too..
Ahem!
An awkward cough brought my self, who was swimming in the past, back to the present.
Whats wrong, Kim Byul ssi? You suddenly spaced out.
Oh, its nothing! Nothing at all!
Snap out of it. Im in the middle of working.
And its quite an important job. No matter how tattered legacy media has become, a weekend evening variety show is not something you can ignore.
The title of <A globally popular actor who played a key supporting role in the film Red Hunter and led the nations pride> does not have a long shelf life.
Actors gain their image through works, and they spend that image on advertisements and variety shows. Here, advertisements are a revenue-generating activity, and variety shows are an investment to convert image into recognition. At least, thats how Kim Byul sees it.
Therefore, Kim Byul choosing to appear on a variety show instead of filming an advertisement was a choice of recognition over money.
So, if you zone out on a variety show and lose half your airtime, youre just wasting your precious image for nothing.
That cant happen!
Kim Byul focused on the shooting.
The variety show Kim Byul guest-starred in had a classical talk show vibe. There were quizzes and punishments, and everyone was slightly over the top. It might feel a bit old-fashioned, but theres a reason why old-fashioned works.
For the veteran senior actor Kim Byul, this format was more familiar than todays broadcasts that chase rawness. It even brought back old memories.
However, theres a reason why they call old-fashioned formats old-fashioned.
The weak broadcasters of today might not understand, but a classic talk show should have a certain fearless spirit to suddenly play disco music and push the guest onto the stage for a dance.
Fortunately, Kim Byul wasnt suddenly attacked by a dance time, but a somewhat bizarre mission was forced upon her.
You chose virtue among wisdom, courage, and virtue! Excellent! Now, lets see how much virtue actor Kim Byul has practiced in her daily life!
What?!
The count starts now!
From now on, Kim Byul has to call someone within 3 minutes and hear the words, Friend! I love you!.
The panel looked at Kim Byul with interest, but unfortunately, Kim Byul didnt have many friends.
How could she afford to make friends leisurely when she couldnt go to school every day and had to work instead?
Still, the reason she doesnt have none but few friends is because there is at least 1.
In a panic, Kim Byul called someone.
Fortunately, the call was quickly answered.
In-seop Were friends, right?
-Yes?
Friends right?!
Me?
EP 6-The Show Must Go On
[Friends right?!]
Hearing Kim Byuls pleading,
[Me?]
There was no particular reason for the response to pop out.
He hadnt pondered over questions like What is a friend?.
He was just flustered.
If someone on the street shouts, You there!, people commonly respond with Me?.
Its a similar context.
However, the reason he specifically answered with Me? instead of Friend? All of a sudden? might be due to his recent habit of overusing phrases like Me?-Why?-I dont want to.
So, this is all Baekhak Publishings fault.
I had to witness firsthand how three words I uttered without much thought could cause such a stir.
It happened to be because this was on a broadcast.
[Puhahahahahat-!]
[Wahaha!]
On the yellow-themed variety set.
With just three words, Me?, Kim Byul is stupefied, staring blankly into the air,
Surrounded by panels of laughing guests, Kim Byul frowned with veins popping on her forehead.
[You We are friends, right?! Right?! Huh?]
I sent a telepathic message to my past self, pleading to just agree were friends. In a situation where time has turned back, it wouldnt be strange to awaken some supernatural power.
But that didnt happen.
Kim Byuls authoritative attitude provoked my inner contrarian, and the past me refused to say the words Kim Byul wanted to hear.
[How could I dare call my heavenly sunbae a friend?]
[Eek! You little how long are you going to milk this?! Anyways, Im not your sunbae! Were friends! Friends!]
[What is a friend, anyway?]
[Ah, stop talking nonsense and just be friends! Hurry up!]
[Were two years apart, how can we be friends.] (TL: In Korea only please of same age are called friends otherwise even if they are friends in public settings they are addressed in formal way i.e. sunbae or hoobae)
[Wow- youre being so funny. Hey! Have you ever treated me as a sunbae even once?!]
[Why are you being like this, Kim Sunbae.]
[Not sunbae, friend!]
Afterward, Kim Byul desperately tried to extract the word friend from my mouth to an almost pitiful extent.
As Kim Byul on the screen became more miserable, the glares pouring onto the real me became increasingly fierce.
It felt as though everyone gathered in front of the orphanage TV, teachers and students alike, was staring at me.
It felt like sitting on a bed of nails. I endured while pretending to be fine, even as I broke out in cold sweat.
Fortunately, thanks to the incident erupting inside the TV, the gazes pouring towards me turned back to the TV.
[Beep-!]
The 3-minute time limit was up.
Kim Byul failed to hear the words Friend! I love you! from me.
The MC, who was biting his lips and holding back laughter, briskly waved the cue card.
[Alright! Fail!]
At the same moment, a fierce wind blew from Kim Byuls microphone, and countless kernels of popped rice poured down on her head.
[Kyaaaaaaaah-!]
The hair that must have been carefully set by the hair coordinator and stylist turned into a mess like that of a ghost.
The popped rice and its crumbs stuck in her hair like dandruff, round and white.
Kim Byul, beyond the screen, probably smelled of the savory scent of popped rice oil.
Kim Byul was devastated by such a cruel punishment.
But perhaps the shock was more to her heart than her body.
Kim Byul, with dead fish eyes, stared blankly into space and murmured to herself in a thin voice.
[Were not friends?]
Damn it.
Feeling a bad premonition, I sneakily tried to get up and escape.
However, the eyes of the orphanage kids gathered around the TV shot towards me.
Like seagulls spotting a person with shrimp chips, the kids heads turned following my movement.
In the midst of those seagulls, the boss seagull, Ma Ki-hoon, pointed at me with his finger.
Grab him.
Dozens of seagulls got up from their spots.
***
The days when the kids at New Light Spring Orphanage treated me like second coming of Jesus who could duplicate cola and chicken are long gone.
When I asked why my treatment had suddenly worsened, it was because I had become too great.
A kid I had once advised, Youre better suited for studying than soccer, explained it well.
-Eh When In-seop became moderately famous, it was awkward because it felt like my friend had become someone great.
-And now?
-Now, how should I put it I cant believe someone so great is my friend.
That this wasnt just a flattering expression but the real deal was something I had already experienced physically.
As my greatness exceeded the realms of jealousy and envy to reach an unbelievable level, the kids had started to treat me like they used to.
Maybe they had gotten used to having a friend who frequently appeared on TV.
No matter how much I donated to the orphanage, if I broke the rules of righteousness on TV, I had to be beaten up like a dog. That was the law of New Light Spring Orphanage.
Having become the greatest traitor in history, I survived by escaping the orphanage and returning to my studio.
Unable to bring myself to bother Ma Ki-hoon, who was meeting his girlfriend for the first time in a while, I returned alone.
Awaiting me was some good news.
Lim Yang-wook had returned to work.
Department Head Lim!
Lim Yang-wook, who was waiting for me in the studio, greeted me with a bright smile showing his white teeth.
Tadaima.
Ta What?
Ah, really. Dont you watch any anime?
Id appreciate it if you kept your Japan otaku manga references to yourself.
Still sharp-tongued, I see?
Our greetings were a bit rough, but we shared a warm hug. After setting up some snacks and catching up on what had happened, it seemed like everything had been going relatively well. Thankfully.
Now that Baek Seol has risen to the position of head of Baekhak Publishings Publishing Management Division, just making eye contact instinctively makes me want to kneel, such is her level.
The malicious plots of the evil faction were crushed into pieces before the august dignity of the Baekhak bloodline, so it seems there wont be any chaos at the company for a while.
Anyway, it was a time of chaos.
As I was letting out a sigh of relief, Lim Yang-wook came to me with a warm smile and expressed his gratitude.
Youve had a tough time too.
It was nothing.
All sorts of temptations were thrown at you, werent they?
I couldnt deny it and nodded.
People from Baekhak Entertainment were rather distant because they were from a different industry, but those from Baekhak Publishing, perhaps because we swam in the same waters, were greedily eyeing me.
It was a time when I could directly feel how my writings could turn into an enormous amount of money.
I didnt realize it when I saw the numbers in my bank account, but facing human greed directly made it all the more tangible.
So, my feelings have been quite strange lately.
I am writing with the same determination and skill as before.
Yet, in one timeline, Im struggling with the interest on a youth rental apartment loan, and in another, Im earning an amount of money that doesnt even feel real.
At this point, labor and capital seem like a joke. And indeed, they are just thatthings that could vanish in an instant with the snap of some omnipotent beings fingers.
Everything a person has worked for their entire life can disappear in a moment due to lymphatic cancer, a sudden misstep by the CEO, or time reversing itself
Anyway, thank, you brat!
Any fleeting thought that had been stirring in my head scattered when Lim Yang-wook roughly ruffled my hair.
Ow.
Haha. I didnt expect you, In-seop, to stick to your principles like this. You said you wouldnt write a single piece until I came back, using your slump as an excuse?
Even as I harshly slapped away Lim Yang-wooks hand, he kept smiling, obviously in a good mood.
Unfortunately, that smile didnt last long.
Its not exactly an excuse.
Huh?
Im really in a slump.
That was the case.
My slump was still ongoing.
* * *
Many sages have discussed human suffering.
<What does not kill me, makes me stronger.>
Friedrich Nietzsche.
<One cannot learn without pain.>
Aristotle.
<Frustration makes a man grow!>
Cao Hong (?).
As can be seen from the insights of such great individuals, appropriate pain serves as a driving force for human progress.
Didnt Dostoevsky also escape his dissolute past after being spared from execution at the last moment by a royal pardon?
I had to admit, the pain I suffered from being beaten up in high school became a driving force for my creativity.
In other words, now that my school life is fairly manageable, my relationships with peers are smooth, and my living situation is comfortable, I, as I am now, lack any compelling stories to tell about suffering from evil in the world.
Therefore, this slump, summarized by Ma Ki-hoon as <being too well-fed>, has been tormenting me for a long time.
Of course, this isnt the first slump Ive faced. Every creator goes through slumps because creativity is not an infinite resource.
However, whenever I faced a slump, I used to overcome it quickly by diving into the world of works by Gu Yu-na, who could be considered my muse and a literary alter ego.
Herein lies the problem.
Now, that Gu Yuna no longer exists in reality.
She only exists in my memory.
So, what now?
In an attempt to solve this problem and quickly nurture Gu Yu-na, I ended up only solving the slump of the innocent Gu Yubin instead.
Teaching Gu Yu-na, I even felt like I realized some harsh truth.
Gu Yu-na, Gu Hak-jun, Gu Yubin that I remembered
They had all disappeared beyond the sands of time. All the karma that unfolded in that world also vanished without a trace, never to be resolved.
Thus, I became an unresolved case. The life I built, the wrongs I committed, will likely never be resolved.
Yes. I knew it.
The only thing that can prove me is my writing.
Literature brought from beyond time is the only evidence that connects that world and me. It was the only proof that I wasnt just a boy who had dreamt a 22-year-long dream.
But that also proved that everything Im enjoying now is an illusion. Im not the prodigious boy everyone boasts about, but a 22-year-old failed writer.
But even though I resolved to continue the literature of a poor, marginalized, and suffering young man, Im living as a 14-year-old genius boy, so how could my writing flow easily?
My mind is still in the past, but my body lives in the present.
Then, where should my literature be?
It took me a month to condense my complex inner turmoil to this point. Indeed, wall-gazing meditation to escape this mental block is such a weary process.
Yet, enlightenment did not come, and I was still aimlessly wandering when the opportunity for resolution unexpectedly arrived.
-Hey. You, whos not a friend.
A friend from this life, with whom I supposedly have no past-life connection, contacted me one day.
With a voice fiercely insisting , I hold grudges.
-Are you enjoying your summer vacation? Of course, unlike me, you have a lot of friends, so you must be having a good time.
You know, Im sorry
-Youre sorry?
As if proving shes not an actor for nothing, Kim Byul changed her tone 180 degrees and threatened me energetically.
-If youre sorry, come to Baekhak Entertainment!
When?
-Now! Right away! Hurry!
Contrary to Kim Byuls speculation, I wasnt someone with many friends and was free all day. My schedule was completely empty.
The problem was there were more than a few people who wanted to fill up that schedule, but that wasnt my concern.
As I shoved my feet into my worn-out sneakers at the entrance, I casually asked.
Im heading out now But whats up?
-Lets shoot a variety show together, just one!
It was the start of a strange summer vacation.
*****
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