"You know it too, don't you?" Soren hissed. "I'm just mad enough to kill you right here and now."
Kel winced as his words stung at her ears. She didn't want to believe him, but there was no use pretending he wasn't right. The man was unpredictable, violent and straight up crazy at times. It was impossible for her to confidently predict what his next move would or wouldn't be under any circumstances.
"Since you two want me to be the bad guy so badly," Soren continued in a low voice, dragging Kel with him as he stepped back, "I'll do it."
The emperor stayed obediently frozen in place as Soren made his way, Kel in tow, out the door and into the hall. After stepping outside the room, Soren stopped for a few minutes, making sure the emperor wasn't following.
"Geez," he sighed, ruffling his hair with his free hand, "The things I have to go through just to make you two behave."
"I'm sure this is so hard for you," Kel mumbled sarcastically.
While his other hand was occupied, Kel moved suddenly, trying to push the knife away. The man countered easily, as though he was just waiting for her to try, and trapped both her hands tightly underneath his arm.
"Ha. Don't you remember, Darling?" Soren pressed the blade more firmly against her neck. "It really brings me pain to have to do this to you. It hurts me more than it hurts you."
There was a hint of amusement in his artificially pitiful tone. Without waiting for a response, he began shoving her down the hall away from the room.
As they walked, Kel held her breath and allowed her saliva to pool under her tongue, afraid even the tiniest movement in her throat would sink the blade into her skin.
Once they neared the end of the hallway, Soren gave her a choice.
"You can come with me obediently, or I can have you bound and locked up," he growled. "Choose now."
Go obediently? With Soren?
The words stirred up an old memory long locked away in Kel's mind. It happened a few years ago, when Kel was in her early teens and she sat listening to a lesson she'd heard repeatedly over the years.
'No matter what happens, do what you can to survive,' the teacher had insisted. 'If they ask you to go with them in exchange for your life, do it without hesitation.'
Kel had already listened many times to this lecture. She knew exactly what the teacher would say next.
pαпᵈα-noνɐ1·сoМ 'Remember, your life is the most important thing," she mouthed along as the teacher spoke.
It certainly wasn't the sort of training given to knights. Rather, soldiers under the king in Mevani learned that only one of them needed to make it back safely, and the rest should fight until their last breath without holding back.
There were many things more important than a single knight's life, it seemed.
But that wasn't the case for the princess.
In a kidnapping situation, as the teacher was discussing, both Adriell and Kel had been taught to prioritize their own survival. Over the years, teachers, mentors and trainers had all asserted that as long as the girls could stay alive, someone would come rescue them.
'Excuse me.'
For the first time since she'd been appointed as the princess' body double, Kel spoke up on the matter.
'Shouldn't we try to get away? It seems more dangerous to wait around for someone to save us.'
She'd been immediately scolded for saying that.
'Even if you have training, which, need I remind you, Her Highness does not, you must never put your safety at risk in the slightest,' the instructor retorted.
Kel wasn't satisfied. Surely, even the demure gray-haired woman peering at the two girls over her slightly crooked spectacles could understand.
There were times when it was obviously better to get away.
'What if waiting is riskier tha-'
'Enough, Keliyah!' the woman snapped, slapping the rod in her hand against the desk.
'Listen to me carefully, both of you,' the teacher narrowed her eyes as she glanced back and forth between Kel and Adriell who was seated just next to her.
'Not one of your lives is replaceable. Don't think ahead so much. Just do what you can to live another day, and, I promise, help won't be far behind.'
Kel wasn't convinced, but she never spoke on the matter again after that day.
Though, in class, she'd bravely disagreed, in practice, she always followed the rules.
The occurrences of being kidnapped were few and far between, but still happened occasionally. Fortunately, it was always Kel taken and Adriell was spared.
As she'd learned, Kel followed her kidnappers demands, doing whatever she could to simply stay alive. (Not that any of her lowlife captors had intentions as malicious as the princess' death in mind.)
The two sides of her life became conflicting in her mind as time went on.
On the battlefield, she rigidly obeyed her commander's orders, even if it meant dying at the hands of the enemy.
As the princess' stand-in, she firmly obeyed her captor's orders to avoid dying at the hands of her enemies.
She'd always assumed the two tactics were complete opposites, constantly at odds with each other in her thoughts.
But now, she was beginning to think the two weren't so different after all.
Following obediently with absolutely no say in her life.
Regardless of who she was made to obey or whether she was forced to live or die, those two facts remained.
So far, that unquestionable obedience had brought her nothing but trouble.
And she was finally sick of it.
Kel gave one final look back toward her room. The emperor wasn't coming. Whether he was actually intimidated by Soren's threat or had some other plan in mind, Kel was on her own for now.
And she wasn't about to wait around for some rescue.
"I'm done following obediently," she spat.
"From now on, I'm going to do what I want."
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