Day 50 – Daytime, Dungeon.
Ahead of us lies the 50th floor. The floor where the floor master of this place is residing. That’s precisely why we can’t charge in there without resolving all pending issues. We have to first confirm everyone’s intentions, and this is the last chance for us to discuss everything. After this comes carnage.
「Now, the question is do we kill the floor master and then have lunch or do we first have lunch and then kill the floor master? Which do you prefer? I’m fine with either one? The time is a bit off for both of those options though? But eating lunch while killing the floor master is probably not good for digestion, so it’s not advisable? Sort of? 」
It’s too early to eat it now, yet it is going to be a bit late after the fight. Having a meal at a proper time is important, but even so, I can’t recommend having a meal during a fight. And yet, why the Flat Gaze?
「Eehm, Haruka-kun, is meal time the only point you want to raise in regards to fighting a floor master? And eating while fighting a floor master is not advisable regardless of whether it is good or bad for digestion!」
「「「Aaah, the feeling of tension before the fight, it all sapped away, it all vanished?」」」
Good grief, they are underestimating the importance of a proper diet for growth way too much. Humans are built by the nourishment they get through their meals? Food is very important? Malnutrition is a sure way to ruin your body. It is precisely because we are about to engage in combat that we have to make plans for a meal?
「Physical activities on an empty stomach aren’t good, but exercising right after eating isn’t nice either? However, to grow muscles, the most effective way would be to eat within 30 minutes of working out? Look, it’s serious business? Way more serious than a fight with a floor master, okay? So I’m not wrong.」
「Eh? Somehow, it sounds like a proper argument? It somehow became a talk about health management? But should we really listen to the health advice of someone talking of the digestion demerits of eating while fighting a floor master? 」
「No, you can’t listen to him! That’s how he always tricks and deceives everyone. Every time you agree with him, your common sense is gradually chipped away. Somehow, his words sound right, but there wasn’t a single instance when the actual content of his words was valid as well. You can’t take what he says at face value.」
I’m pretty sure that normally if what is said is right, then the content of what was said should also be right? And I don’t remember even tricking or deceiving anyone? I mean, would a trickster and deceiver spend every night sewing and crafting in tears? That’s why I’m certainly a serious and diligent highschool boy who never deceived or tricked anyone. That’s most likely definitely true.
And by majority vote, we decided to have lunch.
「By the way, for lunch, we are going to have oyakodon? Sort of? That’s why I thought that fighting a floor master while carrying and eating oyakodon is not good for digestion? Kind of? 」
「「「We are having lunch immediately! We missed Oyakodon-san so much! 」」」
Unanimous decision.
「Uuun, runny egg, soft meat, juicy onion, nicely cooked rice! So delicious!」
「Aaah~, oyakodon for a dungeon lunch, what bliss~. This is it, I’m going to transfer to Haruka-kun’s party!」
「「「You traitor! Are you picking oyakodon over our friendship? Yeah, I’m going to transfer too!」」」
「I’m glad that you liked it? While it might be lunch, I thought that pork with rice might be too heavy for a meal outside? So using the mysterious meat I made a dubious-if-they-are-really-related dish? Kind of?」[1]
「「「I want pork with rice! But please don’t drag Oyakodon-san into those complicated dubious-if-they-are-really-related soap-opera-like circumstances!」」」
Well, far from knowing their parent-child relationship, even their species are a mystery? It might jump above family drama, and develop into species drama? Not just the meat is a mystery, the origins of those eggs are unknown as well? So in fact, these are mystery eggs as well.
By the way, for dinner we have cutlets. I already made the sauce too. All that’s left is to add a topping. I even have a salad from mysterious vegetables and mushrooms ready. Dressing and mayonnaise are prepared as well. I had it all done yesterday evening. Life in a fantasy world is tough. For real.
Also, with『Loner』, I can’t form a party. Cook for yourself like proper adults, okay? Lately, everyone’s girl power changed into battle power, magic power, and attack power? Femininity-san almost evaporated by now?
Now, with our stomachs full, we are ready to challenge the 50th floor! Or rather, it seems to be the last floor, the one with a dungeon master. We have to brace ourselves or we might get in trouble. But the clothes discussion began again. Do they want to force me to make even more stuff? Isn’t death from overworking more of a real danger in this world than monsters or Level Wall?
What a surprise, we are now having an actual conventional boss fight with the dungeon master! Somehow, it’s completely normal combat? The dungeon master is fast and agile, dashing across the battlefield, swiftly swinging its sword, parrying attacks with the shield, and enveloped with a magic storm. On top of being strong, it doesn’t have any clear weakness. An extremely orthodox dungeon master.
Or rather, this is the last floor, and the dungeon master is『Slime Emperor Lv 100』, extremely fast, manipulating swords and shields, and using magic to surround itself with raging winds and lightning? For real. I don’t know what is Slime-san’s weak point? This is our first meeting.
Having a complete Physical Immunity neither slashing nor blunt attacks work on it, and with complete magic resistance, it’s unaffected by any of the spells. And that slime is good enough of a fencer to fend off Armored Pres-san’s attacks.
And it’s so cute, all soft and bouncy.
Not a slimy-slimy or sticky-sticky gross kind of slime.
It’s fighting while being soft and bouncy? But it seems to be angry? Something seems to have displeased it?
Just when it turned yellow, enveloping itself in lightning, it then became red, and began throwing fireballs? Ah~, Shield Girl got blown away.
It’s all soft and cute, but it’s incredibly strong.
Even attacked together by Armored Pres-san, Real Pres-san with the addition of Vice Pres A-san attacking it from the back with her four sword style, it still manages to respond to all of the attacks. It has enough speed to oppose them, and on top of that, as it moves with irregular movements, transforming to counter them, they can’t checkmate it or pin it down.
It’s pulling out multiple shields and swords from its round and bouncy body. Looks like it has either Spatial Magic or Infinite Storage. For some reason, it makes no serious attempt to use magic, but if it were to go all out on magic there would be no way to resist such a barrage. It’s strong with both sword and magic, and is cute too!
It’s trifling with everyone with those movements without a tell. Yeah, a slime has no need for any wind-up motions, and even if it had any, there would be no way to recognize them? It’s just jiggling after all?
It’s so strong that it might be impossible to defeat without Armored Pres-san seriously going all out.
And since they are currently doing joint attacks, Armored Pres-san is not fully serious.
But it’s fending off chained perfect combination attacks.
Jiggle-jiggle it parries them, and then bounce, it dodges.
Jijigle it blocks, and then jiggle jiggle, B-san jiggles too.
「「「……」」」
The ten of them are staring at me in perfect unison? Are they actually taking this fight easy?
「Haruka-kun, why are you only watching?」
「Well? I thought that it’s kind of cute, jiggling, and bouncing like that? Jiggle jiggle? Sort of?」
I mean, it’s so cute, all bouncy and jiggly? And since it’s cute, it might be justice?
「Jiggling and bouncing and cute? Is that about Slime-san? Or is it about a different jiggling? 」
「It’s about SliSliSliSliSliSliSlime-san! Of course it’s about Slililimeme-san? Sort of?」
「「「Who the hell is that Slililimeme-san?!」」」
At this rate, we might not be able to take it down? Bouncing, it’s charging forward, looks like it’s angry?
Well, we are trespassing, so it can’t be blamed for being angry? But it’s so aggressive despite being so soft and bouncy?
Having such a technique and magic, such a wide array of diverse and irregular moves, and yet it sticks to close combat?
Once again, it jiggles forward, trying to bump into them? While being able to use sword and magic? But it’s trying to ram them instead?
Somehow, this jiggling looks like a brave and valiant effort to me.
For some reason, it looks like it is desperate, trying to bump into someone.
From my combined life experience from the previous and this world, there is only one conclusion I can draw from this.
And it is a failsafe method. There is no problem that can’t be resolved by that.
「Want a candy? Kind of? It’s delicious? Tastylicious, as Stalker Girl says? 」
(Jiggle-jiggle!)
Yup, it’s eating. Good thing I brought sweet potatoes with me. As I thought, it’s hungry. Poor thing, you probably were starving, stuck all alone in such a place all this time? Wait? Is that how all dungeon masters are? Hungry and lonely?
「Eeeat a whole lot~! Sort of~? I guess?」
(Jiiggle Jiiggle!)
Frying cutlets that I had prepared for dinner, I throw them to it, and then fry some more, and throw them as well.
「I have bread as well~? Although a slime wouldn’t get the importance of a balanced diet~?」
(Jiggle Jiggle~!)
It’s jiggling up bread as well.
It remained here alone and hungry for so long, that’s why it was angry and attacking everyone. Too hungry to sufficiently use magic it was earnestly trying to body slam someone.
After finally having its fill its mood seems to have greatly improved? It’s now sleeping on top of my head? And even sleeping it’s still jiggly and cute. Since it turned so small, I guess it can also freely control its size?
「「「He bribed it with food! It got attached to him~? Why are you so carefree about letting a dungeon master sit on top of your head?!」」」
Eeh? But it’s so cute, all soft and bouncy? Seriously?
[TL Notes:
[1] Since it might be puzzling – what they are even talking about, Oyakodon is literally “parent-and-child bowl”, because it has a chicken and an egg.
]
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