Chapter 67: Ritsu
(Ryoto's pov)
After I returned inside the inn, I returned to my room where apparently all the boys were using at the moment. They were making a popularity ranking. Yukiko was in the first place, and Kayano was in 4th. Rio was a lot lower than I expected, though.
Yuma: "Great timing, Yuuki. Are you interested in any girls in our class?"
Hiroto: "Everyone already said theirs, so you're not getting out of this one. By the way, Karma chose Okuda."
Ryoto: "It's a tough choice. I can't decide between Kaede and Rio."
Hiroto: "Predictable."
Taiga: "It really is, isn't it."
Tomohito: "Really? I didn't notice anything."
Hiroto: "That's because you have baseball for brains."
Ryoto: "Wait, what are you talking about?"
Yuma: "You see, we made a small bet about who you would choose, and by the way, I won, so pay up, boys."
Karma: "I told you guys that he would choose both."
Yuma: "And I'm glad I listened."
Ryoto: "You shouldn't gamble, you know that?"
Everyone looked at me strangely. Did I say something wrong?
Hiroto: "...You say gambling is bad?"
Taiga: "Mr. Let's make a bet?"
I crossed my arms and looked away.
Ryoto: "...ok, I'm just annoyed that someone made money out of me without my knowledge."
Taiga: "...So you would be alright with it if you got something out of it?"
Ryoto: "Precisely."
Karma: "That's why I got you this!"
He took some of the money and gave me. I obviously accepted it and counted it. Happy with the amount, I smiled.
Ryoto: "And that's why you are my friend Karma."
No one knew what to say.
---
The rest of the trip went as usual. Nothing of notice has happened besides Koro-sensei writing down the ranking of the girls and him listening to girls' gossip. He brought on himself the wrath of everyone, but it was still fun.
Today we got a new transfer student who is an assassin.
Inside the classroom, a big black box stood at the back of the classroom. As we were observing it, it suddenly turned on, showing a face of a middle school, pink-haired girl.
Box: "Good morning. As of today, I will be attending this school. I am the 'Autonomously thinking fixed artillery'. It's a pleasure to meet you."
With that said, she turned herself off.
Everyone was dumbfounded, but I decided to come closer and place a lollipop on top of the box.
I nodded my head, satisfied.
Ryoto: "Better."
As I did that, everyone thought the same thing. 'What do you mean better!!?'.
---
At the beginning of the lesson, Karasuma introduced Autonomously thinking fixed artillery to everyone in the class. She would attack Koro-sensei from the back of the classroom, and he wouldn't be able to counterattack her since she is registered as a student.
The lesson started, and nothing happened for the first minute or so. Kaede leaned back to me and whispered.
Kaede: "It's called fixed artillery, but it doesn't have guns attached anywhere. How do you think she'll attack?"
Ryoto: "Just wait and see."
The box started glowing, and four shotguns and two machine guns came out from the inside. She started a barrage of bullets, but Koro-sensei avoided them easily. He even blocked the last bullet with chalk.
We didn't need to wait long for her next attack. At first, the attack pattern seemed the same as before, but there was a hidden bullet behind the last one, and when Koro-sensei blocked it the same way as before, he was hit in a tentacle finger.
Box: "The killing probability of the next shot is less than 0,001%. The killing probability of the next shot after that is less than 0,005%. The probability that I'll be able to kill you by graduation is more than 90%."
She then smiled at Koro-sensei.
Box: "I look forward to learning from you, Koro-sensei. Continue, and I will adjust my attack."
The machine was learning, and the class realized that she might be able to kill Koro-sensei.
Throughout the entire day, she continued her attacks. Koro-sensei couldn't even catch a break which translated to not conducting the lessons. Not only that, but we needed to clean all the bullets from the ground.
Yuma: "...Do we... have to clean up all of this?"
Takuya: "Hey, fixed artillery-San, haven't ya got any cleaning functions?"
Box: "..."
Takuya: "Tch, ignoring me, huh."
Taisei: "Give it a rest. Picking a fight with a machine is not gonna do any good."
---
The next day when our new classmate started operating in the morning, it couldn't begin its attacks. It was taped in a way that her weapons couldn't come out.
Box: "...Koro-sensei, I cannot deploy my guns like this. Please remove these restraints."
Koro-sensei scratched his head.
Koro-sensei: "...Hrmm, even if you say it like that, I can't really..."
Box: "These restraints were your doing, weren't they? This is obvious violence against a student. I believe that is prohibited through your contract."
Ryoma: "You've got it wrong. I did it."
Answered Terasaka while holding a tape in his hand.
Ryoma: "This'll probably interfere with whatever you were planning, but come kill him after you've gotten yourself some common sense, you piece of junk."
Everyone agreed with what Teraska did. To be honest, it is surprising that he could do something useful.
I started fake crying.
Ryoto: "I can't believe it. Terasaka did something smart."
Ryoma: "You asshole..."
Ryoto: "Don't be so mad, here take a lollipop."
He slapped away the candy I was giving him. What kind of blasphemy is that? To refuse a lollipop.
---
The lessons went as usual without any interference, and we removed the tape at the end of the school.
The next day the box became bigger, and when it turned on, we were welcomed by a full screen of a girl.
Box: "Good morning! Kayano-San, Nakamura-San, Yuuki-San!"
Koro-sensei, behind us, started explaining how he upgraded her to create a sense of familiarity.
The new student became a part of the class, and we even gave her the nickname Ritsu. She was a real 2-D waifu. She was like a real person. She even stopped assassination attempts to not disturb the lessons.
The day after, however, she returned back to her previous self, or so one would think. The moment she was about to start shooting, instead of guns came out flowers.
Ritsu: "I promised to make some flowers..."
I vaguely remember that promise.
Ritsu: "Master deemed that Koro-sensei's modifications are unnecessary for assassination and they were deleted, dismantled and reset, but I personally deemed the 'power of cooperation' to be an indispensable element of assassination and hid the related software in the corner of my memory bank before it could be erased."
She then gave a sweet smile.
Ritsu: "I suppose that my 'rebellious phase' has begun. Would it make 'Ritsu' a bad girl?"
Koro-sensei: "Of course not. That is perfectly acceptable behavior for a 3rd-year junior high student."
And so, class E got a new ally among themselves.
---
END
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