Chapter 118
After my conversation with the twins ended, I found myself walking down the corridor leading to my office.
Suddenly, I was brought to a halt by the memory of Keirsey’s pained laughter and Asena’s words.
“......”
My mind, as well as my heart, felt cluttered. It was hard to describe.
Eventually, I turned away from the path to my office. I guessed that swinging my sword and working up a sweat might help clear my muddled thoughts.
As I was making my way to the training grounds, I happened upon Judy.
“Judy?”
“Ah, Cayden.”
It seemed she had been looking for me, for she rushed over as soon as she saw me.
Her appearance, with subtle makeup, was both unusual and beautiful.
“...You dressed up?”
At my question, Judy pretended to touch her hair, using the gesture to cover her face.
“...Oh? Ah...well...I went to see Lady Liana...”
“You met with Grandma?”
I asked in surprise, to which she removed her hand from her face and responded with a bright smile.
“Yes...! Lady...Lady Liana gave her permission..!”
“…Huh?”
My reaction was slow, due to the turmoil in my head, causing Judy to calm herself down to match my mood. She seemed a bit awkward.
But it wasn’t that I was unhappy, just slow to react.
Gradually, a smile began to form on my lips as I took in her words.
“Is that really true?”
Seeing my genuine smile, Judy also began to smile once again.
“Yes. She was actually concerned about our last formal meeting. She said she would talk it over again with my father. And Lady Liana has given her approval.”
After her words, we looked into each other’s eyes and shared a laugh.
As I naturally opened my arms, Judy embraced me.
Solving what I thought would be difficult parts without any problems was the best feeling.
After a brief hug, Judy stepped back and said,
“Ah, that’s why Lady Liana invited us to dinner.”
“That’s great, I’m happy about it.”
“.....But...”
“.....?”
“....Daisy will be joining us too.”
“....Hmm.”
Daisy too… Perhaps Grandma wanted to meet those who would become my life partners together.
I felt a bit uneasy. After all, Grandma hadn’t welcomed Daisy with open arms yet.
Maybe she intended to clear the air with this opportunity.
I nodded at Judy.
“Got it. I’ll talk to Daisy.”
****
“Daisy.”
I found her in the garden, the one visible from the window of my room.
She turned to look at me as I called out to her, quietly admiring the flowers.
“....Cayden.”
Though she smiled at my arrival, I could sense the turmoil hidden within.
Unlike Grandma, I harbored no ill feelings towards her, and it pained me to see her like this.
So, whenever I had some free time recently, I made an effort to take care of her, but unless the root issue was resolved, she was bound to remain in this state.
Daisy was still striving to be accepted by the Pryster family.
The twins...had their complicated circumstances, so I let that be.
But being disliked by Grandma seemed to be particularly hard on her.
Though she tried to appear strong, her frequent visits to the garden to admire the flowers suggested she was under considerable stress.
I approached her and sat down beside her.
“...Daisy, how was today-”
“-Is something the matter?”
Just as I was about to ask about her day, Daisy inquired.
“....What?”
Ironically, that was the question I intended to ask. She looked so forlorn with her shoulders slightly drooped when I observed her from a distance after all.
“...You seem upset.”
Daisy looked up at me with concern.
It was only after she asked that I realized I was still worried about the twins.
She was worried about me for things I hadn’t even noticed myself.
Here I was, intending to comfort her, yet I found myself being comforted instead.
With a small smile, I said,
“.....I’m okay. Actually, I’m more worried about you, Daisy.”
“........”
“....It’s hard, isn’t it?”
“......”
“....If there’s anything you want to ask of me, just tell me.”
Knowing Daisy’s pain, I couldn’t bring myself to approach Grandma and tell her to stop her behavior towards Daisy.
The more I intervened, the worse Daisy seemed, and Grandma could be incredibly stubborn at times.
It was better to let things resolve naturally, hoping that once Grandma truly knew Daisy, she would soften her stance.
“......”
Normally, Daisy would have thanked me and smiled at my words, but not today.
It was clear she was struggling more than I had thought.
After sitting in silence for a while, she looked up at me with a solemn face and asked quietly,
“......Can you hug me..?”
“.......”
Her words, spoken after much deliberation, prompted me to wrap my arms around her without a word, my expression serious.
I gently patted her back and reassured her,
“.....I’m sorry. Everything will be okay.”
“...You don’t have to apologize, Cayden. It’s all....my fault..”
“....How could it be your fault? Everyone thought I was dead...the Hexter family’s choice was only natural.”
“...But still. The Pryster soldiers and Judy went looking for you...and I, your fiance, and...my family did nothing..”
“.....If it hadn’t been for the plague, you would have come looking for me too. It’s okay.”
As I continued to offer comforting words, Daisy began to calm down.
As I held her, my gaze wandered and found someone else.
Through the window of my room, I saw Asena looking down at us.
“.....”
We exchanged glances for a moment, and Asena managed a sad smile, lifting the corners of her mouth with difficulty.
After making a gesture as if to apologize for the intrusion, she disappeared from the window.
Once again, seeing her like this cast a shadow over my heart.
It didn’t seem like Asena had any ulterior motives.
‘........I’ve actually given up on my feelings for Oppa.’
Her voice lingers in my mind. It was directed towards me, but the resignation in it troubled me.
I could speculate on a few reasons for this change. After all, the recent incident where I nearly died was somewhat related to Asena, and she seemed to be blaming herself.
Looking at Keirsey, she hadn’t been displaying her usual coquettish behavior or whining, and whenever she saw me with Judy or Daisy, she would turn and flee.
They changed because every time they got close, unfortunate events unfolded.
Any love would kneel before obstacles of this magnitude.
But what they had to endure...
The barrier of being siblings, the barrier of my rejection of their feelings. And how the closer they tried to get, the more incidents erupted...
Considering everything, the fact they’ve held on until now was commendable.
But, to me, it was clear that it would come to this.
So why...why doesn’t it feel relieving?
“....Cayden?”
Daisy’s call snapped me out of my thoughts.
We parted, facing each other.
“....Is it that you have something on your mind today too, Cayden?”
Daisy asked.
“.......”
I smiled and shook my head. It wasn’t a topic to discuss with her.
“No, I’m not worried about anything.”
“.....”
Despite my words, she still looked concerned, so I changed the subject.
“By the way, Daisy. Today, Grandma invited you to dinner.”
“Me?”
Daisy covered her mouth in surprise.
“Yes. Judy will be there too. I guess...she wants to see all the girls who will be my wives.”
“...Ah.”
Daisy’s reaction was subtly different than I had expected.
Then, firming her expression, she said with determination in her eyes,
“I’ll go.”
“Daisy, I’m saying this just in case, but if you don’t feel like it-”
“-How could I do that? How could I refuse an invitation from Lady Liana.”
“.....”
That was true. I would have felt the same in her place.
“Don’t worry about me, Cayden. Your comfort today gave me courage. I will...certainly earn Lady Liana’s approval again.”
“....Alright. Just hang in there a little longer. You know...if I get involved...it might complicate things...”
“Yes, I know. Just stay out of it, Cayden. I’ll try my best.”
With those words, she stood up from her seat.
****
As dinner time approached, I started organizing my paperwork.
Since my meeting with Daisy, I had been holed up in my office.
Given the variety of tasks that needed attention today, I had also entrusted the servants with preparing the twins’ meals.
They had grown healthier than before, so I believed they would manage fine.
“Cayden, let’s get ready for dinner,” Grandma, who had been assisting me, suggested.
I nodded at her and got up from my seat.
-Knock, knock, knock.
Just then, there was a knock at the door.
‘It’s Helen. Lady Keirsey has come to see you, Lady Liana, Lord Cayden.’
“....Keirsey?”
I looked at Grandma, puzzled. She didn’t show much change in expression.
Could Keirsey have come about dinner? It had been a while since I had spoon-fed her, could it be about that? She hadn’t been whining lately. I wondered if she had finally decided to act out after such a long time.
“It’s okay to open the door.”
At my signal, Helen opened the door.
Keirsey entered the room hesitantly, with her hands clasped behind her back.
“Keirsey, why?”
I asked, then immediately racked my brain. Keirsey’s mutism never seemed to get easier to deal with.
To communicate with her, I had to ask questions that could be answered with a ‘yes’ or a ‘no’.
“....Did you come because of the meal?”
I inquired.
She slowly nodded her head.
I sighed, not out of annoyance with her, but because I already had a dinner engagement. I wanted to take care of her but couldn’t, hence the sigh.
“....How do I say this? I’m sorry, but it seems I won’t be able to feed you today.”
To that, Keirsey vigorously shook her head.
“.....?”
I wondered what she was trying to say when she pulled something out from behind her back.
There were several sandwiches piled high on a plate. Clearly, they were made by Keirsey herself.
She speaks in a soft voice.
“...Uh-huh.”
I looked at the sandwiches and asked,
“.....For me to eat?”
Keirsey nodded her head.
“.......”
“.......”
“....Ha...this is...really something.”
I felt a pang in my heart and was at a loss for what to do.
My heart grew heavier. Recently, every time I saw her, that heaviness turned into pain. The problem was that this pain was becoming increasingly hard to ignore.
Every time I conveyed news about Daisy and Judy, her smiles, her running away when she saw me with Judy, her still wanting me to feed her, her making this meal out of concern for me, all of it was touching....and at the same time.......
At the same time.......
.......Endearing.
Not as a woman, but as a person.
It was inevitable to feel this way, humanly speaking.
But even that wasn’t good.
The more I felt this way, the more my heart ached.
How could I hate her? It was impossible to hate her. It was becoming increasingly difficult to continue hurting and pushing Keirsey away. I was running out of strength.
All the harsh words I had said to her in the past still lingered in my heart as a lump. I didn’t want to create any more such memories.
Suddenly, recalling Asena’s words, I had a slight inkling of why my heart hadn’t felt entirely relieved...because I wasn’t harboring hatred towards them.
“......”
Looking at Grandma, I noticed she too was at a loss for words.
After the twins had confessed their feelings for me to her, Grandma had become sensitive to any affection they showed, but now, she remained silent.
She too had seen the twins fall apart after the news of my supposed death, so I assumed her thoughts were complicated.
“....Thank you, I’ll enjoy it.”
Unable to refuse Keirsey’s kindness, I accepted the plate from her.
It looked like I would have to eat it as a late-night snack or after dinner.
After nodding, Keirsey started to leave the room but then stopped in her tracks.
As I sat back down, sandwich in hand, ready to eat, my eyes followed Keirsey’s hesitant movements.
Keirsey hesitated for a moment, glancing at Grandma, then turned back and came deeper into the room.
She sat beside me, carefully lifting a sandwich to my lips.
Feeding each other had been a common occurrence, but we hadn’t done it since I became aware of their feelings.
Grandma remained silent throughout.
I had to reveal the truth.
“.........Keirsey, the thing is...I have dinner plans.”
Keirsey froze for a moment, then blinked.
“....With Daisy, Judy, and Grandma.”
Keirsey glanced between my eyes, mouth, and the sandwich, then abruptly stood up.
As if apologizing for the inconvenience, her face flushed with embarrassment, she started to put the sandwiches away, blinking rapidly and opening and closing her mouth.
“Keirsey, leave them..! You don’t have to clean up..!”
Despite my hurried words, Keirsey shook her head vigorously. Then, with her other hand, she mimed eating with a fork.
It seemed she was suggesting I skip the sandwiches and eat well at dinner instead.
....Why does her current self, trying to give up everything, seem harder to witness than when she was seeking my affection through naughty acts?
The effort she must have put into making these sandwiches for me, and the feelings she must have had, tormented me even more.
As my heart ached at her poignant actions, she saw my grimace and smiled.
“...Ehehe.”
Then, as if telling me to smile too, she used her thumb and forefinger to draw a smile on her lips.
After doing so, Keirsey didn’t stay any longer. She quickly turned and disappeared from the room.
“.......”
I slumped in my chair, drained of energy.
Grandma, who had been watching us, spoke softly.
“.....Cayden. I think...nothing has changed.”
“.....What does it mean?”
She started walking slowly in the direction Keirsey had left.
Before crossing the door, she turned to look at me.
“....It means my decision still hasn’t changed… Whatever choice you make, I’ll still respect it.”
--- End Of The Chapter ---
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